Friday, September 22, 2006

When a Problem Comes Along, You Must Whip it

I took the boys out the chiropractor's office this morning for Darwin to get his first adjustment...

He was subluxated two inches. That's bad for an adult, and really out of whack for such a small child.

When you're a wee one, this is how you get adjusted. It was very gentle and Darwin loved it. This is now going to be a weekly routine for him (I already go weekly for myself).

For my Work In Progress...

Kicking the shit out of this head cold. Seriously.

Head Cold: "I am a Head Cold! I shall Rule Your World! Mwahahahahahaha!"

Laura: "Look here, motherfucker. You will be vacating my body now."

Head Cold: "No, I won't. I will hang out for at least a week! Yes! At least a week! And I shall dine on your deliciousness and render you pathetic, tired and uncreative! Yes! And then I shall infect your children! And I will become the Supreme Dictator of the Universe! Yes! Awesome."

Laura: "No, you won't. You've chosen the wrong person to deal with."

Head Cold: "But you're just a stay at home mom!"

Laura: "What did you call me cocksucker? 'Just a stay at home mom'? You don't know who the fuck you're really dealing with!"

Head Cold: "Oh, yes I do. And you're allergic to gluten which means no medicines. Mwahahahahaha, I may just make myself at home for a month!"

Laura: "Have you met Emer'gen-C? Prepare to Get Your Ass Kicked Head Cold!"

Head Cold: "Oh no! You'll have me dead in a few days!"

Laura: "That's the plan! Mwhahahahahahahaha!"

Wha? What was that? Me, conversing with a head cold? Um... um... no. Don't know what you're talking about. Not really.


Leanne said...

Nice selection of tunes for the post.... I found myself humming Devo in my head while reading this, and it was totally appropriate!!!! I love my chiropractor. As a person, she's nuts, but as a back bender, she's PHENOMENAL. Everyone should try it at least once!

PamKittyMorning said...

Lets hope that cold really is gone. And that Darwin feels better. And that life can be good again!

Anonymous said...

Mwhahahahahahahahahaha! Head cold, be gone! Back, be straight! Weekend, be good!

beki said...

I wouldlove to see a chirporactor, but I'm afraid that I'd end up with a quack. How does one find a good one?
I hope he does the trick for Darwin.

Anonymous said...

I hope the adjustment helps Darwin feel better. And I have nothing but scorn and pity for your cold, since it's about to get its ass kicked big time!

Anonymous said...

Anyone ever tell you that you have a potty mouth? he he he. ;-)
So, your Chiro. was o.k with you blogging him too? hmmmmm.
Darwin must have liked it! He's just laying there! Keely would have pitched a fit. I hope the adjustments do him some good. ;-)

Anonymous said...

There's gluten in cold medicine?? It's everywhere, I guess!

I've been thinking about seeing a chiro for headaches (and help with my horrible posture). Where do you go? My mom uses Robin Chiropractic and loves it.

nuttnbunny said...

Our little guy suffered from colic from day 2 (and not that sweet "Oh he cries from 7-midnight every night", but the 24 hours a day for 4 1/2 months kind). Our chiro gave us both some relief :-)
Good luck with the cold. I had to break out my "crazy-yogi" neti pot. YIKES!

Kim -today's creative blog said...

Just had some of the drink myself. With all your alternative adventures, have you stumbled upon the Neti Pot? So good for sinus issues. (once you get past the idea, it's wonderful)

Anonymous said...

Your little man looks so lovely and snuggly just lying down there - I hope this really helps him - he has been through such a lot. Big hugs to him from our family.

MéLisa said...

Oh man that was funny! Ha! Thanks I needed a laugh being Monday & all!

Hope you are all feeling better!