Thursday, November 30, 2006

Runnin' On Empty

The ice came yesterday.

This photo was taken one hour into the freezing rain. I got ice in my eye while taking it.

This morning we awoke to three-quarters of an inch of ice covering everything. Griffin proclaimed, "it's a Chirstmas Miracle! Santa is on his way!" And now we are in a full knock-down discussion of putting up the tree and the lights and making cookies to leave out for Santa.

No school today, thankfully. Aaron cleaned off my car but still. I nearly fell four times yesterday, bringing back horrible memories and fears from the last time I fell.

Supposedly we are suppose to get five to eight inches of snow on top of the ice today. The weather is obviously trying to kick the holiday spirit into me.

Today is the last day of NaBloPoMo, blessed be. Good lordy. Its over. Over.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Dreams Unwind

Am I the only person having a difficult time getting into the holiday spirit?

Anyone? Anyone?


Granted, we've had freakishly warm weather lately. Which will end today with a supposed winter weather advisory. Awesome.

Bulbs are mandatory in this house during the winter. I haven't gotten to properly garden since last spring. Damn that stupid fucking foot incident.

So, anyway, I'm trying. Okay? I'm trying to get into the spirit.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

T-T-T-T-T-Tasty, Tasty

"You know what sounds really good?"
"Baked beans and guacamole."
"Baked beans and guacamole."
"Uh-oh? There is no uh-oh."
"Do you want to eat them together?"
"Not mixed together."
"Uh-oh's are not an option."
"Oh shit?"
"No, no oh shit's either."
"Son of a bitch?"
"If you are trying to insinuate that I'm pregnant, I'm not. Now, go get me some avocados."

Monday, November 27, 2006

Obladi Oblada, Life Goes On

In thirty minutes we are suppose to leave for Darwin's allergist appointment.

I still have to get both boys dressed, including tearing Mister Underpants away from his artwork.

We were going to get Darwin's blood panel pulled and tested for over 300 foods. But since he's had an outbreak of ringworm for over six months, we want to get that cleared up first. We think it's infected.

After the appointment, I have to go by my parents house. Apparently their carbon monoxide detector has been going off and they want me to make sure the dogs are alive.

Then this afternoon Griffin has an appointment with the family doctor. He's got this freaky dry patch under his eye and his cheek is turning pink. He also has two different nasty rashes on his legs.

And I'm guessing you all had nearly forgotten what a bunch of medical freaks we are.

[P.S. If you subscribe to me on Bloglines and it is not updating, you need to change to the "rss.xml" feed. Thanks Alicia!]

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Shout, Shout, Let it All Out

I love the holidays.

I love spending time with family.

I love seeing extended family members that we don't get to visit with very often.

But I'm really tired of sending little boys to stick their nose in the corner so much.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

And the Boys All Look But Know They Can't Touch

Darwin colored through my coloring project today.

And I cried.


Welcome to fucking Kansas. Blech.

Friday, November 24, 2006

Take Me Down, Six Underground, the Ground Beneath Your Feet

Do not leave the safety of your home today.

Trust me.

I made the mistake of wandering into one store today. It was like entering the Dante's Seventh Circle of Hell.

Hold me. Please, hold me.

Aaron's freakish tomatoes that have just been picked off the vine. Fucking Kansas, we still have tomatoes at Thanksgiving. THERE IS AN INFINITE WRONGNESS RIGHT THERE.

And why isn't Bloglines showing me anymore? Answer that one for me please, internet. That is also SO VERY WRONG.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

The Turkey Got Its Revenge

The turkey cut me when I was rubbing its cavity with salt. Damn breastbone.

I no longer feel any remorse for being a carnivore.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

She's Got it, Yeah Baby She's Got it

Gluten-free, dairy-free, egg-free, nut-free Pumpkin Bread: done

Pumpkin Pie: done

Apple Pie: in the oven

White Chocolate Raspberry Cheesecake: scratched off the Thanksgiving list

At least I'm not the only one exhausted.

Did I mention that my in-laws called Monday and said they are coming for the weekend?

Oh. I didn't? I wonder how that escaped my mind, considering it added fifty-bazillion levels of stress to me.

And to everyone that keeps implying that I'm pregnant... did the Earth rotate off it's axis? No? Well, then. I'm not pregnant.

And I'll have the proof next week. Yep. Next week.


Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Meet You All the Way

I'm overwhelmed.

Monday, November 20, 2006

Screamed At the Make-Believe, Screamed At the Sky and You Finally Found All Your Courage to Let it All Go

Yesterday was a No Good, Very Horrible Day.

Aaron and I bickered all weekend.

"Stop. It."
"What am I suppose to be stopping, Laura?"
"That breathing. Knock if off."
"My breathing?"
"Yes. Stop. It. You. Are. Driving. Me. Crazy."

And you know what else? My boobs hurt. Like, seriously. It's been going on for a week. Stop being tender already girls. Knock it off. And stop being swollen and bloated already. Geesh.

And the boys are sick. Nothing says LOVE like covering your mother in vomit. Noth. Ing.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to dress myself in black, lock myself in my bedroom and listen to The Cure all day.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Naughty Naughty, Loud and Bawdy, T-T-T-T-Tease Me

My scrapbook paper obsession is getting out of control.

It is becoming quite disgusting, really.

I see something and I have to find it.

Like a crack addict. But it clutters the house more.


Something else naughty?

Gluten-free pecan pie.

I'm not a pie fan, so it isn't as naughty for me as it will be for Aaron. I'm guessing he'll eat the whole thing in 24 hours.

Which is fine. The boy needs to fatten up for winter anyway.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Baby, I-I-I Can't Wait

Apparently I'm blind.

Well, not blind-blind but bad enough to need glasses. And bad enough that the doctor was "pleasantly surprised" that I don't have a lazy nor crossed eyes. Nice.

Now Aaron's hyperventalating over the price of eye wear. And there goes any hopes and dreams of EVER owning an ipod. Stupid fucking eyes.

Friday, November 17, 2006

Get Off the Bandwagon and Put Down the Handbook

My house is a wreck.

Blue tape is still on the windows.

I've been on the phone with my Grandma Capello for ::looking at phone:: 75 minutes and 36 seconds. And? I'm still on the phone (I just have to hmm-mm and uh-huh a lot).

Griffin has exhausted his creativity.

I really should get off the phone and clean. Really, I should. And plan Thanksgiving. Yep, need to do that too. Uh-huh. Hmm-mmm.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

I"ll Stick Around, I'll Stick Around

Dear Laura,

I will make your life hell.

Hate you,
Blue Sticky Tape

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Don't Worry, Even if Things End Up a Bit Too Heavy We'll All Float On, Alright

I spent three hours yesterday putting up blue tape for painting the trim work. Because I? Am a perfectionist.

And an extraordinary messy painter.

For Festivus, Darwin wants paint cans. Lots and lots of paint cans. Because they make awesome drums.

And he will use those paint cans and cans of Neocate (because, you know, he has to use The Most Expensive Things In The House As Toys) to create towers.

Hopefully today will be my last day painting. And then tomorrow can be a clean-up day. And then life can return to a normal (whateverthefuckthatmaybe) routine.

And then, I can start researching flooring for the entry room. And oh! Guess. What.

Our refrigerator is about to die. So I get to research those too.


My camera is on the fritz. I've owned it for less than 16 months and the motor is dying. Because I? Have taken over 6,500 pictures and I've worn the motor out. Nice.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

I Hate Myself for Loving You

I'm rather proud of myself, I finished my Apron ATC swap a day before the deadline.

This is the first time I've ever made these, and I love them. The smaller something is, the cuter it is. Seriously.

I really like the little saying I came up with. I thought it was very funny. But the more I wrote it, the more it sounded like a quiet desperation. And I? Love quiet desperation. I love it when something has more than one emotion to it.

And I'm officially smitten with the 7gypsies stamp. I can see myself using it all the time.

I'll be mailing these out today along with the rest of the pin cushions. Um, yeah. Sorry 'bout that. But they are On Their Way.

I went to the scrapbook store this weekend to look around. I walked out with this...

... apparently, I'm making Festivus cards now. How the fuck did that happen?

Monday, November 13, 2006

Oh, Every Time I Lose My Head

Whew. Painting the walls are done.

north view
east view
south view
west view

The color is beautiful in low light, but slightly harsh in bright light. And shiny. Like, too shiny. I'm convincing myself that it's just my brain not adjusting to the change. Aaron wants me to do a glaze in a darker tone. But, hello finances. And it will look a lot different once the blinds are up, the flooring is changed and the room is full of furniture.

Speaking of which... we have carpet in there and it needs to be changed out. I was going to do some el cheapo self adhesive tiles, but I started to get concerned about the floor underneath the carpet.

This room use to be a breezeway and the previous owners enclosed it in the late '70s. It is a concrete pad with some interesting rubbery flooring on top. After watching about a zillion shows of This Old House (which I learned quite a bit from), I started to get concerned that they flooring contains asbestos. My neighbor, who's a contractor, came over and took a look at it. Of course, I'm right (what else would you expect from a nerd?). Which? Shit.

So now it sounds like we have to do a floating floor on top. Which: a. Awesome and b. Fucking Finances Again.

So now I have a new project to look forward to in that room. Once the windows, doors and trim are painted (the EcoSpec semi-gloss is on order, it likely isn't coming in until tomorrow afternoon) we'll clean up and put the room back together for the holidays. This gives us just enough time to tear each other's hair out over what floating floor we want. I want cork. I like cork. Cork is pretty and good for the environment. Aaron doesn't like it. Nor does he have any suggestions.

What is it with men and their dumbassery skills?

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Turning Japanese, I Think I'm Turning Japanese, I Really Think So

The wonderful Soo and I decided to do a small swap. Look what I received...

Thank you so very much Soo! I love it!

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Give it Away, Give it Away, Give it Away Now

I'm taking a break from painting (omg y'all, the green is awesome) to do the pin cushion drawing.

And 39 comments? Wow, thanks everyone. I wish I could make everyone a pin cushion, but I'm not that crazy. (There will be no tutorial because the design and process are copyright'd. But I'll be willing to do some swaps after the holidays. Because, holy fuck, the holidays are comin'.)

Anyway, on to the drawing...

... and the winner selected by Griffin (who can't even spell so there are no questions about fairness)...

... Suzie Sews.

Congratulations Suzie! Please email me at no_appropriate_behavior [at] yahoo [dot] com.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Oh! What a Feelin', When We're Dancin' On the Ceilin'

Actually, it should be when we're primin' the ceilin' but whatever.

And look...

... fancy pants paint. Fancy pants paint that cost a fortune. Fancy pants paint that I had to go down to the hood to get (Troost, for all you locals). Fancy pants paint that no one should have an allergic reaction. And that's why I had to get fancy pants paint.

Anyway, here's the game plan: today I'm going to finish priming (just one more wall) and I'm going to paint the ceiling with my fancy pants paint ("Simply White" by Pottery Barn for those who care).

Tomorrow I will be painting the walls with my spankin' awesome color-matched to green scrapbook paper paint.

And depending on when the semi-gloss arrives, I will either be painting the trim work on Monday or Tuesday (again, "Simply White").

I'm getting overwhelmed and I haven't even picked up a paint brush today. (Will. Resist. To. Discuss. How. Sore. I. Am. Will. Resist.)

Let's just say that I am so excited by reward later...

Gluten-free Orange Cake


Thursday, November 09, 2006

You Can See I'm Single-Minded

Okay, two weeks till Thanksgiving. Time to plan... this week all you have to do is decide what size turkey you want and order it from your grocer. Or, you know, be really American and just buy whateverthehell they have on had. Or be really, really American and deal with the one your husband brings home from the office.

This is also a good time to complete any home remodeling projects you have. Like, oh say, THE ENTRY ROOM THAT HAS BEEN UNDER CONSTRUCTION FOR 19 MONTHS. Yeah, that's a good one to be working on right now.

half-way primed

Or, you can always do something with that river of leaves in your front yard.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

All I Wanna Do is to Thank You

I hope you are sitting down. Because what I'm about to tell you is shocking. Simply shocking. More shocking, perhaps, than Britney filing for divorce from K-Fed. Seriously.

Are you sitting? No liquids in your mouth?

Are you sure?

Really, really sure?

Okay, then...

I finished sewing my thank you gifts.

I know.


Shocking, right?

Now, are you ready for the unveiling?

Really ready?

Absolutely ready?

Okay, then....

Patchwork pincushions using 1930's repro fabrics.

As you may recall, my foot got broken back in June after an interesting afternoon at the park. I received many wonderful get-well gifts from my blogging friends. I wanted to properly thank everyone and these are what I came up with.

Each one has been tested by my children for durability and whackability (sans the buttons, of course). And I'm sending one to each person that sent me a parcel.

Of course, I did make one extra...

... to be sent to a commenter as a general thank you to everyone for reading and commenting here.

Simply leave a comment to this post. I'll be drawing names on Saturday afternoon.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Come On Try a Little, Nothing is Forever, There's Got to be Something Better Than in the Middle

I was going to write a big post today about public service and go vote and why are we gen-x'ers still fucked up and where's our civic duty and blah, blah, blah.

But, we are too busy over here crafting to shove politics down your throat.

Okay, maybe not too busy.

Monday, November 06, 2006

Well All These Times, They Come and Go and the Long Don't Seem So Long, Over Ten Years Have Gone By



"Do you realize that we've been together for ten years now?"

"No, we haven't."

"Yes, we have. We met face-to-face the first weekend in November ten years ago."

"No, we didn't."

"Yes, we did. It was 1996. I was 19. You were 24. Ten years ago."

::eyes pop out:: "It's 2006?"

"Um, last time I checked, yeah."

"Holy crap, that's a long time."

"Love you too, honey."

Sunday, November 05, 2006

I'd Like to Roll with the Gangstas, Although it's Apparent I'm Too White and Nerdy

It is Sunday morning, which means it is time for nerds to be artistic...

Griffin painting (what is it with boys and black?).

Aaron drawing....

...and drawing...

...and cutting and sticky-taping pentagon pyramids.

And me, showing off my new supplies.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Love Me Or Hate Me, it's Still an Obsession; Love Me or Hate Me, That is the Question

By popular demand (popular. ha. demand. haha), here is what I created at my scrapbooking class last night...

... I'm a wee bit of a rebel. The class leader gave us two color schemes to choose from. I left the class and got what I wanted to do. (ooooo... such a badass!)

And, yes, as a matter of fact -- we did paint that playroom over two and half years ago. And, yes, the blinds have not be rehung. And, yes, the lonely lightbulb is still dangling out of a hole in the ceiling because my husband still hasn't reinstalled the light fixture.

You wanna make somethin' of it?

Friday, November 03, 2006

I'm Not an Addict (Maybe That's a Lie)

I just found this article and had to share...

I have 128 feeds on bloglines and four additional ones that bloglines won't load. I'm not an addict. Oh, hell to tha no. Nuh-huh. No way.

I'm just considering the link a PSA. Yeah, I'm doing it for the benefit on the community.

You Gotta Squeeze a Little, Squeeze a Little , Tease a Little More

Yes, I'm still working on the thank you gifts...

...and my pile is getting rather out of control.

Really, I should be done soon. I have 12 projects complete, which means I only have three more to go. And then I'll be done. Done. Dooooooonnnnnnnnneeeeee.

Am I the only person that starts something, thinking it's really charming and cute, but by the time I'm done it has lost its charm? It's panicking, really. I'm becoming concerned.

I get to go to a scrapbook class tonight (well, as long as Aaron doesn't get sent to Canada. His passport is up-to-date. Damn it). I'll be making some chipboard letter thingies. Hopefully I'll pictures tomorrow, you know, since I signed up to write every single day.

::banging head on table::

And what do you all mean I'm not organized? I'm offended. Really.

::looking around house::

Okay, maybe you have a point.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

I'm Back With an 808 'Cause I'm Bossy

Do you realize what today is?

Do you?

Three weeks until Thanksgiving.

Let's start our list, shall we?

(My sincerest apologies to my non-American readers, for I am about to go into Obsessive Mode for this American holiday. Also known as "Ye Old Time of Fat Assery.")

This year, supposedly, only my parents will be joining us for Thanksgiving. Typically Aaron's parents come down from Michigan as well, but they have graciously bowed out this year.

Them choosing not to attend doesn't really make a difference in how much I cook. I cook for at least 30 people to attend because:
A. I love to cook
B. I actually enjoy eating Thanksgiving leftovers (I'm not good at eating most leftovers. I like my food fresh. I'm high maintenance like that)
C. I was a Girl Scout, and thus Must Always Be Prepared
D. I'm always convinced that a large group of strangers (or family) (or friends) will arrive on my doorstep starving

So, at the three week mark, this is what we must do:
1. Make a list of the recipes you want to make
2. Make a list what you want to accomplish for the days leading up to the holiday

See? Small steps, people, small steps.

So, first item: the turkey.

My turkey has to weigh at least 25 pounds. Even when I made Thanksgiving for just me and Aaron one year, the bird had to weigh at least 25 pounds. There's a couple of reasons for this: leftovers and consistent cooking time.

It seems to me, the smaller the bird is the more difficult it is to get it cooked. And people? The turkey MUST be roasted.

None of those scary bags that you put the bird in. Oh, hell to tha no. All you need to do to roast the perfect turkey is a large, sturdy pan and some vegetables (as we get closer to Thanksgiving, I'll fully spell it out; I don't want to scare anyone with my Holiday Perparedness and Obsessivness just yet).

Also, you need to start thinking about what other dishes you'll be serving, especially those friends of mine who are vegetarians and vegans. There's a lot of recipes out there that are delicious and can be substantial for the holidays, and everyone can enjoy them.

Some of my favorite sites for recipe inspiration are: All Recipes, Martha Stewart and Real Simple.

Notice, I said inspiration. Due to our allergies to wheat/gluten and Darwin's amazing allergy list, I take inspiration from sites and tweek them to fit our family's tastes.

So, in over the next few days I'll be making of list of what I'm making and the timeline. And for shits and kicks I might be posting them here.

At least that way I won't have a paper trail all over my house.

Now, if only someone could explain to Griffin that it's past time to make Halloween decorations and do it in a manner that wouldn't cause a Total and Complete Meltdown, that would be great.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

I'm Probably Going to Explode; it's True, I'm Probably Going to Explode

Hello, November!

This seems to be a good time to get organized, doncha think?

::blink, blink::

No, really. Organized. Sounds good, right?

::blink, blink::

Is anyone feeling the pressure of life overwhelming them? Anyone?

::blink, blink::

Okay, I'm in over my head. I over extend myself. I really shouldn't be surprised, I've been lectured on this since I was in elementary school.

In anycase, I've decided that November is the month to Get It All Together.

For starters, I signed up to participate in NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month). I'll be posting every day for the month of November.

::blink, blink::

This will help me get all my verbal sewage out of my brain so I can focus on other things. Like, what the fuck are we gonna do for the holidays? and whatever happened to that fucking gluten-free cookbook, bitch? and getting that damned entry room painted already and not getting the fucking flu again.

And let us not forget the most important part, finishing the stupid fucking foot thank you gifts. Oh yes. I'm still working on those.

I still have more to do.

::blink, blink::

Like participating in the Apron ATC Swap. I've never made an ATC before, and yes, I'm scared shitless. And I was thinking I need a new bag, made out of this. And I just got this fabric and I don't know what to do with it (it's too cute just to throw in the stash, don't ya think?).

::blink, blink::

At least Halloween is over. So maybe my list is do-able this month.

::blink, blink::

Or, maybe not.