What am I doing to cope with such a predicament, you ask?
Well, when life gives you lemons...
... make a Lemon Drop Martini.
All you need are sugar, water, lemon(s), and citrus flavored vodka.
(Before I was diagnosed with Celiac Disease, we used the Smirnoff citrus vodka, but it's made from wheat. Hanger One is the only brand -- that I've found, and I've asked around for help -- of flavored vodka NOT made from wheat; it is made from grapes. In any case, Hanger One is much smoother.)
First, make a simple syrup.
In a small saucepan, poor an equal amount of water and sugar.
I eyeball it.
Next, put the flame on "medium" and heat it until the sugar dissolves and the liquid becomes clear (but not boiling).
Not yet!
Yes, there.
Next, roll your lemon(s) to breakup the pulp and make it easier to juice.
Betcha didn't know I have chubby hands, did ya?
Next, cut the lemon in half.
(Yes, this is a tutorial for dumbasses. Written by someone who is obviously past tipsy.)
Next, squeeze the lemon over a bowl.
I like to use a pasta bowl because...
... the next step is to dip your glass in the lemon juice. Then...
... dip it in sugar. That's how you make a sugar rim (I'm totally slurring my words now).
Ta-da!
Maybe we should call it a rim job. Oh, that was naughty-naughty. Inappropriate!
Next, put some ice in your martini shaker.
(Note: when you are making a martini that uses vermouth, you want to stir it. Shaking a vermouth-vodka martini makes yucky air bubbles in the drink and it's not smooth. Always make the vermouth-vodka martinis in the glasses they will be served in.)
Next, pour in some booze. I pour in about half.
Next, add some of that fabulous simple syrup you made earlier (make sure it has cooled a little).
Next, some lemon juice.
(I really no longer measure these out -- do a little, taste and add what you need; typically, its about three parts vodka, two parts simple syrup, one part lemon juice).
Now, put the lid on and shake!shake!shake! Shake!shake!shake! Shake your booty! Shake your booty!
And pour.
Voila! Now you all can be as snockered as I am!
12 comments:
you crack me up. it's been a long day and husband still hasn't come home from work. read your blog and felt thirsty. you are too funny. sheesh, just catch a plane here already. you can drink all the fancy drinks (with umbrellas) you want. i'm joining you of course!
mmmmm. that looks delicious...... It's only noon here in Chicago, but I may need to make a visit to the bar for one of those..... (I'm not really good at "making" things....)
you are so funny... I have been reading your blog for awhile but this post just made me laugh so much.
I have 3 kids and know the feeling of being a travel widow....great post girl !
Yum, can I come over for one of those? Oh wait, I'm pregnant, can't do that! Damnit!!!
I'm not a drinker so I don't have much to say except WOW! That's a clean stove! I gotta go scrub mine now. Did you clean it before you took the pictures? You did didn't you. And your pan is really clean too. I don't think my pans were that shiney when they were new. What's up.
Hey, found you blog researching celiac desease. Recently a chemist spoke to our support group and said that although some liquors are made with wheat or rye, if they are distilled, there is no gluten in them.
Beer on the other hand is brewed so gluten remains.
Thank you so much! I am so going to make one. when I originally read this I was drunk myself, only on beer, how boring. Plus your sidebar is awesome! So many blogs, I cannot wait to read them all.
That looks delicious. My husband is out of town now, too. If only I'd been smart enough to stock up on martini ingredients!
Hi Anonymous,
I've heard the same thing -- it came out a few months ago that the FDA had decided that both vinegar and distilled alcohol did not contain gluten.
But having distilled or grain vinegar still makes me sick. I haven't tried my whiskey yet (too afraid to).
Recently, a man in Kansas City made gluten free beer out of sorghum malt. You can read the article at http://www.thekansascitychannel.com/news/7828947/detail.html
I'm not much a beer drinking (I like the hard liquor myself), but I'm ecstatic that more gluten-free options are available to us!
I'm not a drinker either, but colorfool is right - that's a CLEAN stove! Nice nails, too. I haven't had long nails in 5 years - ever since baby #1 was born...I can't seem to keep the dirt and diaper ointment from getting stuck under there!
Believe it or not, I'm not much of a drinker either. I have maybe one drink every month or two.
And I typcially only have a shot of ouzo on the worst of days. There's a reason why we call it "Mommy Calm Down Juice."
Oh man.. I'm comin' to your house.. how did you KNOW citrus vodka was my favorite drink? I usually do vodka gimlets (citrus vodka with a little lime juice) but I just changed.. now lemon drops are gonna be my favorite!
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