Circle, Circle, Dot, Dot

I'm on my fourth day of a migraine.

In addition to the can't-handle-bright-lights and you-all-had-better-whisper and mommy-is-acting-like-a-crazed-screaming-bitch side effects that a migraine brings, I'm also suffering from chills, body sweats, a temperature and fatigued muscles.

Oh, and lack of wittiness.

Cramping Styles is the Plan

Last night after dinner, Darwin decided it would be a really good idea to strip down and suddenly proclaim, "Pee-pee? In da potty? Pee-pee? In da potty?"

So I walked him to the bathroom and he did as he always did: freak out at the site of the potty.

"Nnnnnnnnooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!"

It's a healthy relationship.

I sat back down at the table and looked at Aaron. "Should I get out the little potty now?"

"Yeah. Probably. But it's dirty."

"I don't want to."

"Don't want to what?"

"Potty train Darwin. He's not ready."

"He's dancing in the living room, singing his love for the potty."

"But he's still a running pooper."

"Woman, he wants to pee in the potty. We should encourage that."

"But he doesn't even realize When He Poops Yet."

"But he wants to use the potty."

So I went upstairs and got the potty.

Darwin's face lit up like the Easter Bunny and Santa magically arrived on Halloween.

Darwin played with the potty. He'd sit, hold down is penis, stand up and proclaim, "Pee-pee?" Then he'd stand up, check to see if the potty was wet and begin the whole process over again.

He had to have an audience. If I didn't sit with him in the bathroom he'd follow me out, potty in tow, and sit it down and begin the pee-pee checking all over again.

After two hours of this, he suddenly began to get irate. Screaming, "Mommy! Mommy!" and holding his penis.

"What? You finally need to pee?"

"Ppppppppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Well, then. Sit. On. The. Potty."


"Nnnnnnnnooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!"

"What? You want to put a diaper back on and pee in the diaper?"

"Yes! Peas! Diaper, Mommy, diaper!"

There's Not a Line That Goes Here That Rhymes with Anything (Anything!) (Anything!)

Ever have one of those days where you stare at the ouzo in the fridge and you wonder hmmm... just how late in the day should I wait before diving in?

She Bop - He Bop - a - We Bop, I Bop - You Bop - a - They Bop

She's totally right.


It really does make life better.

When They Insist On Knowing My Bliss, I Tell Them This...

Yesterday Griffin stayed home from school because he was "sick." He was running a slight fever (99.9), claimed his tummy and head hurt and he was lethargic.

And since Griffin was "sick," Darwin decided that he too must be "sick."

And they took full advantage...


... by snuggling on the couch all day and getting constant refills of popcorn.

Sometimes I think I'm too damn nice. Or maybe not.

Every time Griffin got up to do something (other than go to bathroom), I yelled at him to lay back down. I mean, seriously, if you're gonna stay home from school, you're gonna do the time. Right?

And now I'm running a slight fever (lovely). Good thing we don't have any plans this weekend other than stuffing our faces and hanging out at home.

I Got a Reputation - Uh Huh Huh

"Mommy, we don't say bad words in this family."

"That's right."

"We put our noses in the corner."

"Yep."

"We don't say bad words like stupid."

"That's correct, Griffin."

"If I say that bad word I put my nose in the corner."

"Yes."

"Or like yesterday, when Darwin bit your finger and you screamed motherfucker. You still haven't put your nose in the corner yet, Mom."

We are Living in a Material World and I am a Material Girl

Aaron made good on the birthday follow through. The boy did good.

For starters, from Griffin and Darwin I got...


... an Easy Bake Oven and extra pans. I've always wanted an Easy Bake Oven and have complained about it for years. So now I have one. And now I get to figure out gluten-free recipes for it.

Then, from Aaron...


... an iPod Shuffle and a wireless remote for our Playstation 2. So now I can play Pac Man without yelling at the children to stop jumping over my wires. And I have an iPod. An iPod people. I'm like, at the cutting edge because it's the Shuffle. And it is seriously the size of a quarter.

And now I'm counting on all you good people to tell me how to get music on it without paying 99 cents a song at the iTunes store. Okay?

Then, as an added bonus on top of all my phone calls and cards, I received two surprises in the mail...


... fabrics and lip balm (and stickers and candies for the boys) from Lera. Thank you so much! You should have heard me gasp! (I recently complained that I could no longer find the flower-y fabric.)

And...


.. a beautifully embroidered hankie from Lori. Thank you! I love it so much!

It's amazing (and a little sad) how getting stuff on my birthday makes me really happy.

And thank you for all the wonderful and amazing birthday wishes yesterday. They made my day. Thank you so much!

You Look at Me as if You're in a Daze

In the months leading up to Christmas, Aaron began to proclaim "I'm not doing ANYTHING for Christmas! Nothing!" After what happened last year, I kinda understood and took it upon myself to get my stocking stuffers and a gift from Santa.

Christmas morning we were opening gifts. Aaron was opening another gift from his large pile and asked, "Where's Mommy's gifts from Daddy?"

"I don't know, where are they?"

:: eyes bugging out :: "Where are Mommy's gifts from Daddy?"

"I. Don't. Know. Where. Are. They?"

Yeah. When Aaron said he wasn't doing nothing for Christmas, HE MEANT IT. And then he got mad at me for not getting myself gifts from him.

I've only told this story to a few people because it makes me look dumb for being upset because yes, he did tell me he wasn't doing anything for Christmas and because it makes Aaron look like an asshole.

Actually, I don't mind that it makes Aaron look like an asshole because he did act in an asshole-ish way.

Everyone has asked what he has done to make it up and I constant reply nothing, he hasn't done anything. Which is totally true.

Of course, I leave out the point that I told him he HAD BETTER MAKE IT UP FOR MY BIRTHDAY, BECAUSE I SURE AS FUCK AIN'T PLANNING MY BIRTHDAY.

Now, don't get me wrong. I love taking care of my family and doing all the stuff that keeps the household running, clean and in a semi-organized fashioned. But sometimes? Sometimes? I want to be taken care of and appreciated too.

This weekend we had my parents over to celebrate my 30th birthday. I made a gluten-free lasagna and...


... a gluten-free chocolate truffle cake.

(Yes, I made them.)

Aaron has under 15 hours to make up his holiday disaster.

Mahna Mahna, De Do Do Do Doo, Mahna Mahna, De Do Do Do Doo

We got snow. Lots and lots of snow.


Six inches of snow.

We had quite a busy weekend, but more on that tomorrow.

Today is my deadline of Ali's Weekly Challenge (remember?); this week's assignment is to draft a list of what would be considered our scrapbooking essentials...

my digital camera -- it's a modest little guy, but he does a fantastic job at taking photos of my family and documenting every little detail of our lives

snapfish.com -- so far, they have the best quality photo printing I have found and they print my photos on matte paper, the only kind I will use

photo file :: post it notes -- this is the only way I can remotely keep myself organized and remember the dates

my computer -- for storing photos, writing this site (which the material for this is great as reference for our scrapbooks), fixing photos and being my biggest organizational helper ever

paper trimmer :: photo trimmer :: scissors -- great for getting my paper, photos, emblishments, ribbon, etc, cut cleanly and percisely

waxed paper -- the biggest secret in my stash, it keeps all my trimmers and scissors clean and sharp (anytime something isn't working well, cut a bunch of wax paper. it cleans the blade, sharpens it and lubricates it all at the same time)

card stock :: patterned paper :: paper holder -- I am a paper junkie. Really, I have loads and loads and loads of paper. I love it. I love all the different colors, weights and textures. I love mismatching different lines together to get exactly what I want on my pages.

QuicKutz hand die cutter :: letter dies :: xyron create-a-sticker -- it may be heavy and awkward to use, but I love hand cutting letters and running them through the xyron to make my own titles that match perfectly.

back and white letter rub-ons and stickers -- when I want a more simple and easy page

Zig Millennium black pigment pins :: uni-ball Signo white pin :: mechanical #2 pencils -- perfect four journaling, sub-titles and marking where paper and photos need to be cut

Herma dotto removable tape runner -- just about the only adhesive I use

12-inch top loading albums -- to store everything when completed

Aaron, Griffin and Darwin -- because, seriously, without them I'd have nothing to scrapbook and no reason to

Those are my basics. Yes, I have tons more stuff than that in my stash, including lots of ribbon, embellishments, special adhesives, stamps, inks and three more drawers of stuff.

(Hopefully I'll be able to take photos, upload them to flickr and link them all soon. Done!)

Everyone's So Intimately Rearranged

Thanks for all the compliments from the roses the other day. They were purchased at Whole Foods on sale. Like, sale-sale. Nine dollars for a dozen sale.

Everyone's compliments and asking if they came from the garden made me think I really need more rose bushes in my garden. Yes! More rose buses!

Of course, we have lots of work on the garden this year. I'm trying to convince Aaron that we should go ahead and chop down a tree (the limbs constantly bang on the house and it makes icky leaves that don't compost correctly over winter - they turn slimy and that's not good for the garden beds), tear down the dilapidated greenhouse (I've been working on that one ever since we bought the house, it is dee-lap-i-date-ed), take out the compost bins (too close to the house, which brings mice to the house and WE ALL KNOW WHAT HAPPENS THEN) and then build raised and tiered garden beds so Aaron and Griffin can have a proper fruit and vegetable patch.

The hardest part of all that will be convincing Aaron to agree with me that I should do it. Yeah, notice how I said "I" -- he's not so much of a DIY'er.

So, I need some advice on this. I purchased it at a thrift store this week (99 cents) for my mother-in-law, because she collects camels. It is frightfully funny. But I need to know how to clean it, the tin is kind of yucky. Any thoughts?

Also, does everyone want a recipe for gluten-free blueberry muffins or pumpkin pasta this week?