I Got a Reputation - Uh Huh Huh

"Mommy, we don't say bad words in this family."

"That's right."

"We put our noses in the corner."

"Yep."

"We don't say bad words like stupid."

"That's correct, Griffin."

"If I say that bad word I put my nose in the corner."

"Yes."

"Or like yesterday, when Darwin bit your finger and you screamed motherfucker. You still haven't put your nose in the corner yet, Mom."

We are Living in a Material World and I am a Material Girl

Aaron made good on the birthday follow through. The boy did good.

For starters, from Griffin and Darwin I got...


... an Easy Bake Oven and extra pans. I've always wanted an Easy Bake Oven and have complained about it for years. So now I have one. And now I get to figure out gluten-free recipes for it.

Then, from Aaron...


... an iPod Shuffle and a wireless remote for our Playstation 2. So now I can play Pac Man without yelling at the children to stop jumping over my wires. And I have an iPod. An iPod people. I'm like, at the cutting edge because it's the Shuffle. And it is seriously the size of a quarter.

And now I'm counting on all you good people to tell me how to get music on it without paying 99 cents a song at the iTunes store. Okay?

Then, as an added bonus on top of all my phone calls and cards, I received two surprises in the mail...


... fabrics and lip balm (and stickers and candies for the boys) from Lera. Thank you so much! You should have heard me gasp! (I recently complained that I could no longer find the flower-y fabric.)

And...


.. a beautifully embroidered hankie from Lori. Thank you! I love it so much!

It's amazing (and a little sad) how getting stuff on my birthday makes me really happy.

And thank you for all the wonderful and amazing birthday wishes yesterday. They made my day. Thank you so much!

You Look at Me as if You're in a Daze

In the months leading up to Christmas, Aaron began to proclaim "I'm not doing ANYTHING for Christmas! Nothing!" After what happened last year, I kinda understood and took it upon myself to get my stocking stuffers and a gift from Santa.

Christmas morning we were opening gifts. Aaron was opening another gift from his large pile and asked, "Where's Mommy's gifts from Daddy?"

"I don't know, where are they?"

:: eyes bugging out :: "Where are Mommy's gifts from Daddy?"

"I. Don't. Know. Where. Are. They?"

Yeah. When Aaron said he wasn't doing nothing for Christmas, HE MEANT IT. And then he got mad at me for not getting myself gifts from him.

I've only told this story to a few people because it makes me look dumb for being upset because yes, he did tell me he wasn't doing anything for Christmas and because it makes Aaron look like an asshole.

Actually, I don't mind that it makes Aaron look like an asshole because he did act in an asshole-ish way.

Everyone has asked what he has done to make it up and I constant reply nothing, he hasn't done anything. Which is totally true.

Of course, I leave out the point that I told him he HAD BETTER MAKE IT UP FOR MY BIRTHDAY, BECAUSE I SURE AS FUCK AIN'T PLANNING MY BIRTHDAY.

Now, don't get me wrong. I love taking care of my family and doing all the stuff that keeps the household running, clean and in a semi-organized fashioned. But sometimes? Sometimes? I want to be taken care of and appreciated too.

This weekend we had my parents over to celebrate my 30th birthday. I made a gluten-free lasagna and...


... a gluten-free chocolate truffle cake.

(Yes, I made them.)

Aaron has under 15 hours to make up his holiday disaster.

Mahna Mahna, De Do Do Do Doo, Mahna Mahna, De Do Do Do Doo

We got snow. Lots and lots of snow.


Six inches of snow.

We had quite a busy weekend, but more on that tomorrow.

Today is my deadline of Ali's Weekly Challenge (remember?); this week's assignment is to draft a list of what would be considered our scrapbooking essentials...

my digital camera -- it's a modest little guy, but he does a fantastic job at taking photos of my family and documenting every little detail of our lives

snapfish.com -- so far, they have the best quality photo printing I have found and they print my photos on matte paper, the only kind I will use

photo file :: post it notes -- this is the only way I can remotely keep myself organized and remember the dates

my computer -- for storing photos, writing this site (which the material for this is great as reference for our scrapbooks), fixing photos and being my biggest organizational helper ever

paper trimmer :: photo trimmer :: scissors -- great for getting my paper, photos, emblishments, ribbon, etc, cut cleanly and percisely

waxed paper -- the biggest secret in my stash, it keeps all my trimmers and scissors clean and sharp (anytime something isn't working well, cut a bunch of wax paper. it cleans the blade, sharpens it and lubricates it all at the same time)

card stock :: patterned paper :: paper holder -- I am a paper junkie. Really, I have loads and loads and loads of paper. I love it. I love all the different colors, weights and textures. I love mismatching different lines together to get exactly what I want on my pages.

QuicKutz hand die cutter :: letter dies :: xyron create-a-sticker -- it may be heavy and awkward to use, but I love hand cutting letters and running them through the xyron to make my own titles that match perfectly.

back and white letter rub-ons and stickers -- when I want a more simple and easy page

Zig Millennium black pigment pins :: uni-ball Signo white pin :: mechanical #2 pencils -- perfect four journaling, sub-titles and marking where paper and photos need to be cut

Herma dotto removable tape runner -- just about the only adhesive I use

12-inch top loading albums -- to store everything when completed

Aaron, Griffin and Darwin -- because, seriously, without them I'd have nothing to scrapbook and no reason to

Those are my basics. Yes, I have tons more stuff than that in my stash, including lots of ribbon, embellishments, special adhesives, stamps, inks and three more drawers of stuff.

(Hopefully I'll be able to take photos, upload them to flickr and link them all soon. Done!)

Everyone's So Intimately Rearranged

Thanks for all the compliments from the roses the other day. They were purchased at Whole Foods on sale. Like, sale-sale. Nine dollars for a dozen sale.

Everyone's compliments and asking if they came from the garden made me think I really need more rose bushes in my garden. Yes! More rose buses!

Of course, we have lots of work on the garden this year. I'm trying to convince Aaron that we should go ahead and chop down a tree (the limbs constantly bang on the house and it makes icky leaves that don't compost correctly over winter - they turn slimy and that's not good for the garden beds), tear down the dilapidated greenhouse (I've been working on that one ever since we bought the house, it is dee-lap-i-date-ed), take out the compost bins (too close to the house, which brings mice to the house and WE ALL KNOW WHAT HAPPENS THEN) and then build raised and tiered garden beds so Aaron and Griffin can have a proper fruit and vegetable patch.

The hardest part of all that will be convincing Aaron to agree with me that I should do it. Yeah, notice how I said "I" -- he's not so much of a DIY'er.

So, I need some advice on this. I purchased it at a thrift store this week (99 cents) for my mother-in-law, because she collects camels. It is frightfully funny. But I need to know how to clean it, the tin is kind of yucky. Any thoughts?

Also, does everyone want a recipe for gluten-free blueberry muffins or pumpkin pasta this week?

The More I See the Less I Know the More I Like to Let it Go

"If L.A. is anything like Dirt, I'm so glad I live in Fucking Kansas."

"Woman, do you not pay attention to the Red Hot Chili Peppers? The whole damn state is that way."

And I Don't Even Know the Time of Day, I Guess it Doesn't Matter Any Way

My pile is still there. Stop laughing.

I did manage to make it to the thrift store yesterday and totally score on some children's books and percale cotton pillowcases. My intention was to find some books for my mini-swap partner (note to self: figure out how to get one of them button thingies).

My partner is the wonderful Malene who lives in Denmark. (Denmark! I love mailing internationally!) I'm so very excited.

And yet, completely terrified.

She has an awesome personal site and she also has an internet shop. So, you know, I had better not fuck it up.

Not to say I fucked it up last year, but I'm always terrified when I do a swap. I'm afraid to suck.


Luckily, Malene is very nice and she and her children love handmade items. So, ::gulp:: I had better get to it.

And Different People Have Different Needs

I was tagged by the fabulous Cheryl for a six weird things about you meme, so here it goes...

1. One of my favorite things to eat is baked beans and rice. Seriously, I could live off it. And the worst part? I make the baked beans in the microwave. It's a recipe that came with the "cookbook" with our first microwave when I was a kid.

2. Aaron and I don't share blankets when we sleep. He likes a comforter, I like a quilt. I also have to layer the quilt between my legs and wrap it around me. And I rub my feet together to get comfortable in bed.

3. I have a slight obsession with popping pimples and getting ear wax out of ears. I've even been known to pick ear wax out of my friends' children's ears. Yeah, it's really bad. What is even worse perhaps, when I was giving birth to Griffin and he was crowning my OB told me to look in that evil mirror to watch. I told her I didn't want to, but she talked me into it. The first thing I saw was not a baby coming out of my girlie bits, oh no -- it was a monstrous pimple on my inner thigh. And I tried to talk a nurse, Aaron, the doctor, anyone into popping it for me, while I continued to push.

4. I started collecting Pez dispensers when I was three years old. The last time I counted was nearly ten years ago and I gave up once I got to 657.

5. I love cleanness and organization, but I have a pile-building habit. I will pile and pile and pile stuff and become so terrified of it, I'll leave it there for months. Case in point:


It's my goal to tackle it today. Really. There's a lot of stuff in there I want to read.

6. When Aaron and I fight, like get into a really good fight, I start crying and go clean the kitchen cabinets. I cry and scream at him while I sit there scrubbing, scrubbing, scrubbing. I guess I should be happy the cabinets are so dirty right now.

I'm suppose to tag six people to do this. I'm not really good at tagging, I always feel like I'm gonna piss someone off. So don't feel obligated to do it if you are tagged...

Lera
Angela
Babybug
Kristencan
LLA
Katurah

Or if you weren't tagged but would like to be tagged, consider yourself tagged.

Now, to go tackle that damn pile...

Motionless Wheel, Nothing is Real, Wasting My Time in the Waiting Line

So, I got my wish...


... we are finally getting some snow.

Of course, this doesn't come without consequences. My soiree was canceled yesterday due to the freezing rain.

And, of course, the gluten-free mini cupcakes were already made and ready to go.


And they are delicious. And the recipes are posted. And I made a new flickr account to document the cooking too. I've been a very busy bee.

Speaking of busy bee-ness, I even managed to make a pillow this weekend...


... which was immediately hijacked by a certain two year old. I had to wait for him to go to sleep to get a proper photo...

... that's much more better. It was very nice to make something. I haven't sewn or scrapbooked since October.

It's nice to be getting back in the swing of things.

Yo, Yo, This Hard-Core Ghetto Gangster Image Takes a lot of Practice

We braved the torturous weather to get haircuts today. Yeah, I'm crazy.

You know what else is crazy? Those motherfuckers that dilute my windshield wiper fluid at the places that I get my oil changed out. Crazy bastards.

So, back to the haircuts. Right.

I told my hair lady (that's her name: hair lady) that my current shampoo changed their formula and now my dandruff is beginning to come back and my hair looks greasy within 12 hours shampooing.

Hi, my name is Laura. I write about my dandruff issues.

Anyway, she shampooed my hair with something different, cut off three inches and blow dried it. I loved it. My hair was light and fluffy, no fly aways, perfect.

So, I bought some of the new shampoo and we drove down street so Aaron could clean the windshield.

Well, wouldn't you know it, I started itching. All over my face, my scalp, in my ears.

So I started reading the new shampoo and conditioner ingredients and what do they contain?

Wheat.

Wheat.

For those of you in the back: WHEAT.

So we had to go back to the hair salon place for me to return them. It took 15 minutes and three people reading ingredients to find one shampoo and conditioner that doesn't contain wheat.

(If you are late the game: I'm allergic to wheat. I also have dandruff issues, in case you didn't pick up on that one.)

So when we got home I immediately had to take a shower to wash all that crappy wheat off of me. I also had to use my old shampoo and conditioner because Aaron wasn't about to deal with me having another possible allergic reaction.


See the fly aways? Damn fly aways.

Damn wheat.