Thursday, August 25, 2005

My Heart? Its Broken.

We have been having some "issues" with Griffin lately. "Behavior Issues" to be exact.

He has always been very rambunctious, hard-headed and haphazard. Personally, for the most part, I enjoy it and find him to be amazing, intelligent and fun.

But lately its out of control. He's hitting kids, wrestling and beating up his friends and let's not even discuss how awful he's been to his brother lately.

Last Saturday I had to physically remove him from the library due to horrible behavior. On Tuesday I was called back to the Kids Club in the gym to "give him a talking-to" about not hitting, and after that he still was hitting. Today, I was called back to the Kids Club and I hadn't even been at the gym for 15 minutes yet. So I packed up our stuff and we left.

And the clincher? If it keeps happening he'll be banned from the club. Additionally he's starting speech therapy tomorrow and preschool next week. This behavior is not going to fly.

And I feel like the most horrible mother in the world.

What is it that I/we are doing so wrong to make him act this way? When he gets upset he starts screaming "You hit me! Stop hurting me! You hit me!" when in fact, no one even touched him. He's three and a half, where is he getting this erratic behavior from?

So I decided to take him to the doctor in the slightest case that he has an ear infection (he doesn't) and to get some sort of recommendation for new discipline tactics.

And do you know what the doctor recommended? A book (a Christian book) about how raising children is really like training them, like you would a dog. A DOG.

But okay. Its Christian. I think I can handle that. Its about training. Okay, I can handle that. Its like training my kid as if he were a dog. Um... kay. Guess that makes sense, considering I use to make him wear a harness and I told him to pretend he was a puppy (the harness? It was a necessity after running into the street AND jumping into a lake on the same day).

So maybe it will work. Because something has to. My heart is broken because my child is becoming a person that no one wants around. And I know I do not want that, and I know he doesn't either. The worst part is he get so excited about being around other kids he doesn't know how to harness his energy.

I just hope I'm able to help him soon.

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