My Lip Gloss is Cool, My Lip Gloss be Poppin'

I did not get a dick in a box for Mother's Day.

Instead, Aaron gave me a raging head cold teamed with sore throat, acidic stomach and sinus infection. Which has resulted in a sandpaper mustache and burns in my pillowcases from the nasty nasal drip.

Blech.

And everyone has it. Aaron's home from work for the second day in a row and the boy never stays home from work.

So... if I'm quiet this week... it means I'm getting a free facial acid peel.

When I, You and Everyone We Knew Could Believe, Do, and Share in What Was True

Yesterday the awesome Samantha tagged me to pick my five favorite sites.

Wha? Just five? Huh?

Considering that I have 158 feeds in bloglines, a folder of 14 more sites that aren't available on bloglines and a folder of four sites to check weekly and yeah that gets a little overwhelming.

So... here's some people that I love that you may not know about.

Oil Cloth Junkie -- I heart Michelle. Big, gushy-gushy heart love with sprinkles and sequins. She is my new best friend, and knows it as well. Did you know we live in a hand basket going to hell together? We do. It's lined in purple velvet and it's oh, so comfortable. She lives in Lawrence, about an hour away from me, with her husband and two kids. And she makes stuff, lots of stuff. And lives with color, lots and lots of color. And she even let her husband rip out part of their driveway for a garden plot. Seriously, seriously, awesome.

Tomfoolery -- Tommy doesn't update too often, but when he does it usually contains snarky commentary of his homosexual escapades, which let's face it: that's hawt. And he totally talks smack about famous people and doles out free advice that they don't take, but should.

Meegan Blue -- Meegan is awesome. Meegan has been writing as long as I have (actually, a month longer) and tells of her life as a mom (she has three kids -- that's more kids than hands; MORE KIDS THAN HANDS, PEOPLE) and the struggle to find some time to craft and make stuff too (hmmm... sounds familiar).

This is Me -- Laura has more than she knows what to do with. A single mom of a very awesome special needs boy and a crafter, she is a Wonder Woman to be looked up to. And her tales make me want to buy a gun and open fire at insurance companies.

Craft Junkie -- Emy and her husband and son are currently living in Italy (Italy! Italy! Italy!), she too is a fabulous crafter who makes all sorts of fabulous stuff, including recently boiling plastic spoons and turning them into jewelry. I'm totally not kidding. Jewelery. And it is adorable.

So, there. You can choose to play along. Or not. I'm a rule breaker like that.

Yesterday I did manage to get out and plant all my flowers...


::sigh:: Children. Gah. They always dodge into the frame at the last moment, don't they? Here's a close-up...


Ah. Much better.

Friday Lego love

And for extra fun, has anyone heard about this yet?



It's a documentary on the new wave of indie craft in America. I'm all over that.

But You Don't Understand My Point of View, I Suppose There's Nothing I Can Do

Work.

Work, work, work, work, work.


But fun work.

(Meh. Never mind. Too muddy. Blech.)

Hey, Here I am; I Hear the Universe Sing, the Celestial Scream; I Am Not Alone, Are You Receiving Me Clear, There is Others Out Here

I love the searches that find me. My current favorite is "ghetto jugs." I mean, seriously, how could you not love that?

Last night Aaron and I were watching Saturday Night Live (one of our favorite shows). It was last Saturday's episode of the season's best skits and then this came on...



... and Aaron proclaimed, "Now I know what to get you for Mother's Day!"

Gotta love the family budget. Hmph.

Speaking of the family budget, I managed to ween Darwin off his $380-a-month neocate habit and onto a $68-a-month rice milk habit.

Maybe this means we'll be able to not live in a van down by the river.



Score.

Tuckie says, "Wassup?"

Today we are expecting more pop-up thunderstorms intermediate with insanity.

Swallow All Your Tears My Love, Put On Your New Face

The rain here in the Kansas City are has been relentless (relentless). I shouldn't complain too much, as many of you know a town in Kansas was completely obliterated by a tornado this weekend.

In any case, the rain locally has been crazy. Our basement has had its fair share of puddles (but I know others who have had it worse) and the ground is soggy. So soggy that when I step off the concrete my shoes smoosh into the ground and I lose my balance.

The rain let up today, just long enough for me dash outside. The garden is a complete mess, and there's tons of work to do. But it's been brought to my attention that my ho needs her crack, so here you go...

miniature iris

ornamental grass

peonies

elephant ears

aliums

volunteer daisy

I, I've Been Watching You, I Think I Wanna Know Ya (Know Ya)

Whilst golfing Saturday, my dad* noticed something scurrying around in the grass, just a few yards way from a lawnmower.

He bent down, picked it up and found...


... a baby turtle.


And when I say baby, I mean baby.


After doing a ton of research, we figured out it is a Western Painted Turtle. We now know what he likes to eat (earthworms, bits of dandelion and romaine lettuce, grapes, insect larvae, etc.), what conditions he likes (plenty of water to swim in, with lots of hiding places and a nice flat rock to dry out on) and a firm understanding in the family that if he's not happy, then he will be released into his natural habitat.


Tuckie the Turtle Lord would like you get out of his grill already.

* Just so no one gets all high and mighty: Tuckie was caught at a golf course in Missouri; from two hours of research on laws in Missouri, I can confidently say there are no laws prohibiting the capture of Western Painted Turtles in that state. Booyah.

It's Getting Rough, Off the Cuff I've Got to Say Enough's Enough

It has been raining here all week and I love it.

But now, now, now it is suppose to rain this weekend too... which means we might have to put off a bunch of gardening shit because the ground is sopping wet.

It's like the entire yard needs to be rung out and air dried. Grrrrr...

Don't mess with my dandy lion blowin', Mama.

Looking at kiddie porn (Lego catalog) is exhausting.

I SWEAR TO GODDESS: I will not break my foot this year and will have a plentiful, beautiful garden, damn it.

Only the Curious Have Something to Find

I love swaps. Have I mentioned that yet? I fuckin' love them.

First up: Vintage Button Swap Deux, from the awesomely fantastic Guylaine.


Lots and lots of buttons, awesome beads, earrings and a magnet. And oh, the magnet. I love me some cute magnets.

And I also participated in a spring fling (pink and green) swap, with the wonderful Fiona.


S - sunglasses case with tissue holder (green and white stripe) and milk straws
P - paper and pens, cupcake paper liners (so fucking cute)
R - (w)rapping paper (the flowers -- look at those flowers!)
I - I love Australia books, tattoos and towel
N - ninja turtle pez dispensers (yeah, Darwin wouldn't allow his to be photographed)
G - groovy face washers (they are so soft!)

So much amazing handmade stuff, I love it!

(To see what I sent Fiona, click on her name; Guylaine still hasn't received hers yet, damn it.)

Let it Never be Said That Romance is Dead

I heart Martha.


Sometimes I think the Universe royally fucked up by not making me her child.

Sing Us a Song, You're the Piano Man

"Mama? Mama, sing."

"You want me to sing you a song, Darwin?"

"Yeah, Mama, sing!"

"Twinkle, twinkle, little sta-"

"No, no, no, no."

"The itsy, bitsy spider, wen-"

"No, no, no, no. Widdle in the middle."

"Little in the middle but she got much back?"

::jumping up and down:: "Yeah Mama!"

::sigh:: "I LIKE BIG BUTTS AND I CANNOT LIE.."