Best Evah Gluten-Free Chocolate Chip Cookies

You know with a title of "Best Evah" something's got to be good. And better deliver. And these will. I promise.

(And a post title that's not a song lyric! SHOCKER! But when it's two months from now and you want to make some damn cookies 'cause someone pissed you off is when you'll realize my omnipotence awesomeness and be thankful.)

Now, let me vent that I have, in fact, been in a funk for quite awhile. Not a depression funk per se ('cause, trust me, I had one of those post-pregnancy before and stared at our kitchen knives, this is definitely not that kind of a funk), but a food funk.

A food funk as in my gluten-free flour mix had become a FAIL due to manufacturer's inconsistencies of grinding the flours the same texture from batch-to-batch (hell, within a bag once I had super-fine to crazy-course grind brown flour) and flours being gross (rotten? mildew-y? I have no idea, just gross) at the time of purchase. So for the past year, year-and-a-half I have hardly been baking.

So I've been experimenting, trying new things - and let me tell you, what we can try is quite narrow. Including gluten and soy issues (like me), Griffin and Darwin also have serious dairy, nut and legume allergies. Which means figuring out food is extra fun for me.

Two weeks ago I bit the bullet and tried King Arthur's gluten-free brownie mix (was kinda bitter, not very chocolate-y) and then their all-purpose flour mix. Finally, a consist gluten-free flour mix that we can all have (ingredients are white rice flour, tapioca starch, potato starch and brown rice flour) and I don't have do some voodoo hand mixing.

Now, let's be clear: I didn't receive anything for free, they don't know me from Sam Hill and this stuff is hella expensive. I'm talking locally paying $5.79 plus tax for just over four cups of flour.

Welcome to the Gluten-Free Lifestyle: we hope you have no other interests other than eating 'cause you're not gonna be able to afford them anyway.

And I admit: we sacrifice and pinch and save to keep up with my foodie ways. I like to cook, we all like to eat. And we're lucky that we kinda-sorta make it work.

Now, I'm not saying this mix is so magical that it resolved my funk: I resolved my funk. Or, I'm working to resolve my food funk. I'm a work in progress goddammit.

But I guarantee these are damn good cookies. And to answer your questions: yes, I'm sure you can substitute other gluten-free flours for the King Arthur I use. I was just telling you what I use in case you wanted ideas. And yes, you can make these cookies non-gluten-free too - use the same amount of your wheat-y flour and do not add the xantham gum. Yes, this recipe can be halved - or doubled. And yes, you could make this with less chocolate but just don't tell me 'cause then I don't think we could be friends.


Best Evah Gluten-Free Chocolate Chip Cookies (dairy-free too!)

1 cup shortening*
2 cups brown sugar
2 eggs
1 tablespoon vanilla
1/2 teaspoon salt, preferably kosher
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 1/2 teaspoons xantham gum
3 cups gluten-free flour
2 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips**
1 cup dark chocolate chips**

Preheat over to 350.

In a large bowl cream shortening and brown sugar to fluffy. Add eggs and vanilla and mix until fully incorporated. Add salt, soda and xantham gum, scrap the sides and mix a bit more. Slowly add flour and mix until just incorporated. Add chocolates and stir by hand.

Let dough set at room temperature ten minutes to two hours - this allow it to melt together and I got the idea from Jackques Pépin so you know it's a good idea.

On a lined cookie spoon blobs of dough (whatever size you like) and then bake 7 to 12 minutes, until done. For a "standard" size cookie I prefer eight minutes, which is golden on the outside and still chewy all around.

Recipe makes 4 to 5 dozen cookies depending on size and how much cookie dough you eat.

Not that I know anything about eating cookie dough. Ahem.

*I use organic gluten-free certified palm shortening. Not a dairy-free household? Substitute half the shortening for an equal amount of room temperature butter. Yum.

**I use Ghirardelli semi-sweet chocolate chips and Whole Foods' 365 dark chocolate chunks - both are gluten & dairy free.

Say Something Once, Why Say it Again?

I've been eating Greek pasta salad for three days now and you know what? I want more.

On Saturday I made a huge-ass batch of it for Sunday Plus Lunch at "church."

Which? I'm sorry. I still can't call "church" church-without-the-quotation-marks even though we've been going there nearly two years. I mean, really. They don't shove religion down your throat. They encourage questions. And where else, other than a Unitarian Universalist "church," can you go to the director of Children's Ministries and say, "Hey! Have you seen the graffiti on the playground? It's kick-ass. Can we keep it?"


And she walks out there and says, "Oh, that is cool. I like it too!"

COME ON, seriously. It's awesome.

Anyway, so I made this ginormous batch of gluten-dairy-soy-egg-nut-corn-free Greek pasta salad so we can start being even more all inclusive than we already are and offer options for those of us with crazy-ass food allergies. However, not many of us came and Laura's been known to go a little crazy in the kitchen so we had lots of leftovers.


I used the base of my Greek salad and instead of lettuce, added pasta. And I tripled the recipe. But the basic recipe goes like this...

For the dressing:
1 lemon, zested & juiced
oregano leaves, from 5 or 6 sprigs, chopped/minced
a couple of tablespoons red wine vinegar
salt & pepper
olive oil (some people use a lot, I like it just enough to bring it together, a few tablespoons)

... combine in a salad bowl and whisk.

I make the exact same in a second bowl (and add three or four minced garlic cloves) and use it as a marinade for chicken to throw on the grill.

Now back to the salad, add whatever you like - for us it's usually half a cucumber (seeded & sliced), a quarter red onion (thinly sliced), a sliced red pepper, a handful of grape tomatos and some kalmato olives. Throw in a head of romaine or pound of cooked & chilled pasta, toss and hello, lovah. (We serve the feta on the side. You need feta. Unless you're allergic.)

I'm writing this all because lately I'm completely focused on what I'm not accomplishing. I'm not accomplishing quilting, crafting, dusting, vacuuming and hell, I can't even appropriately stay on top of the damn dishes. But I do cook and quite a bit. I just need to get my head out of my ass and focus on the accomplishments and not the failures.

(Faaaaaaiiiiiiiillllllluuuuuuuuurrrrrrrreeeeeeessssss!!!!!)

Oh, Won't You Stay Just a Little Bit Longer

Today is the one-year mark of me actually keeping up this blog (amazing! I know!).

I wish I could invite each and every one of you all over for coffee or tea, to sit and chit-chat in person, to let the kids play together.

But, alas, that is just not possible. So here's a cake so we can pretend...


Gluten-Free Cinnamon Swirl Coffee Cake

12 tablespoons unsalted butter, at room temperature
1 ½ cups sugar
3 large eggs
1 ½ teaspoons vanilla
1 ¼ cups sour cream

2 ¼ cup gluten-free flour mix*
¼ cup corn starch
2 teaspoons baking powder
½ teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon kosher salt
2 ½ teaspoons xantham gum

For the Cinnamon Swirl:
1/3 cup brown sugar, packed
2 teaspoons cinnamon
¾ cup chopped pecans (optional)

For the Glaze:
½ cup powdered sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 tablespoons milk


Preheat over to 350 degrees.

In an electric mixer, cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy, about three minutes. Add eggs one at a time and blend until incorporated; scrape down the sides. Add vanilla and sour cream and blend until smooth.

In a large bowl, mix together dry ingredients with a wire whisk. With the electric mixer on low, slowly add dry ingredients until blended and fully combined. With a rubber spatula, scrape down the sides and hand mix until everything is incorporated and smooth.

In a small bowl, mix sugar, cinnamon and pecans.

With the butter‚’s wrapper, butter the inside of a 10-inch tube or bunt cake pan. Pour half of the batter into the pan, spreading and leveling with a knife. Sprinkle the cinnamon mix on top, careful not to touch the pan. Pour the remaining batter over the top, and spread again with a knife.

Bake in 350 degree oven for approximately 50 minutes, until a knife put through the center of the tube comes out clean.

Cool on a wire rack for 45 minutes; invert cake on to cake plate and let cool at least another 30 minutes before glazing.

In a small bowl, mix powdered sugar, vanilla and milk until smooth (add more sugar or milk to achieve desired ability). With a spoon, drizzle the cake with the glaze, encouraging it to flow over the edges.

Enjoy!

*Gluten-free four mix: In a resealable container, place 2 cups brown rice four, 1/3 cup tapioca flour and 2/3 cup potato starch. Place the lid on the container and shake until fully combined.

Don't want to make it gluten-free? Replace the gluten-free flour mix with all purpose flour and omit the xantham gum. (And yes, LLA, you can increase the amount of vanilla if you so choose -- I use double strength vanilla and I think it may still need more...)