I know it sounds cliché, but I totally needed a long ass weekend to decompress.
Not that much "decompressing" happened, of course. It was more like "getting my head out of my ass."
I'm really good at the shoving my head up my ass. I don't know if it's the longer days or what but the anxiety rises (as does the prayer for a snow day - who doesn't like a good movie day?) and the depression sets in.
I began cooking Thanksgiving dinner on Tuesday. Three days in the kitchen and I finally began to feel better. Odd for some, I imagine, but cooking puts me in a good mood and clears my mind. Must work on that more (not that I don't already cook about 28 dinners a month).
Now with the holiday weekend over, we are suppose to focus on Christmas. I fucking hate that.
Driving down my street, most people have their trees up already. Geesh. Talk about some fucking peer pressure right there. And the presents, gah, the presents. Seriously? Can we talk?
I'm so damn tired of being a consumer. But in the same breathe let me say, I think we need more legos.
So we've sat down. We're working on a budget (good; very, very good) and making a list. Trying to find that special balance of spirit and not growing debt.
I'm really hoping to hand-make some gifts this year, but I just don't know what quite to make. Like, the grandmas -- perhaps some coasters? Same for our parents? Like I said, I'm tired of the consumerism. I don't want to buy people shit to clutter up their home. Gah.
In previous years, I've made food (but everyone feels guilt for the waistlines), purchased bath salts (great for those who actually take baths, not so great for those who do not), gotten gift certificates to plays (and they actually were not used).
With today's society of get-what-you-want-when-you-want-it and the dumbfounding frowning upon being thrifty or handmade, where's the balance of satisfying the gift receivers along with making the gift giver happy?