Thursday, April 10, 2008

Ain't No Doctor That Can Cure My Disease

Darwin's doing super after my shoving my finger down his throat and forcing him to puke at the park yesterday. Very little must have been left in his system and his allergic reaction has been pretty mild. Thankfully.

You know, nothin' says "mothering" like "here son, LET MY SHOVE MY FINGERS DOWN YOUR THROAT AND FORCE YOU TO PUKE." Come to think of it, nothing says "love" quite like that either.

And since we're talking about funky-ass medical issues, here are two more we're dealing with...


Warts
. Darwin has two warts on his hands. The first one he began to develop in January and a month ago he began getting a second one. Once that one popped up, I started doing some research (nerd alert! nerd alert!) and discovered the duct tape method.

I brought up the duct tape method with the allergist, who said it works very well. According to what I have found, within six months 80% of duct taped warts are gone, 50% of untreated warts are gone and 30% of acid-burned and frozen-burned warts are gone.

So... what's the duct tape method? Uh, you wrap the finger in duct tape. Seriously. And amazingly, the duct tape I bought didn't contain latex (another high-allergen in this house). The catch is you have to have duct tape on all the time. So whenever a piece pops off, we take the other one off, wash and dry his hands and put on new duct tape.

I can say, after doing this for three weeks, this method is working quite well. The smaller, younger wart (how sad is that? that he has multiple warts?) is nearly gone and the older wart has decreased by about a third in size and it's really, really soft now.

The other medical issue? Canker sores.

Oy. I developed a canker sore on the bottom of my tongue (ewwww) on Sunday. I've been brushing, flossing and gargling like crazy. It's just getting bigger. I'm thinking I may be having an allergic reaction to the new dental supplies (I bought the store-brands of pre-rinse, toothpaste and mouthwash last week) or it's just good old-fashioned stress (not that I've been dealing with any of that around here, oh no, I'm not a bundle of nerves wanting to cry over laundry not put away, nuh-uh, not me).

So, back to the computer today and guess what! I SHOULDN'T BE USING MOUTHWASH WITH A CANKER SORE. Oy. I also made a paste of baking soda and water and put it on my tongue.

I never realized that baking soda tasted salty.

So, let's see... in recap I've discussed forcing my son to puke, warts and canker sores today. I'm rockin' this blogging thing.

22 comments:

Leah said...

vomit, warts and all, your blog is still entertaining!

Kim - ScrapToMyLu said...

if you're not allergic........you can combine benadryl and malox, rinse and it makes it all better.
I also use a mouth wash for mouth irritations called Peroxyl or something like that.

kristi said...

Yeah, Mike used duct tape on a plantar wart that came back after being frozen off twice. The duct tape worked much better. It's also good for craft projects, but you probably don't want the kids to know that lest your house end up looking like mine (duct tape and popsicle sticks everywhere).

I'm glad the forced puking worked!

Jada2929 said...

I get a mouthful of canker sores when I got on cheap chocolate binges. I'm now taking L-lysine and it seems to be reducing my outbreaks.

Rachel said...

yowsa! Canker sores hurt.

miss chris said...

I have used duct tape on plantar's warts. Yep, it works. Harder, I think on hands, with all the washing and whatnot. But good luck.

michelle said...

Alum. For canker sores -- works wonders. (just leave a bit of powder on the sore for a minute or so, then rinse out your mouth with water) Seriously. Hope you feel better soon!

Alicia A. said...

Brian gets canker sores all of the time. I know how much they hurt him. I hope it heals up soon.

Green Kitchen said...

My mom found out, by accident, that NuSkin, or whatever it's called, gets rid of warts, too. I imagine it's suffocating it/them, probably like the duct tape. She had painted it on her thumb to close a cut, and when it came off it pulled out the warts that were under her thumbnail. Eeeeew!

Bitterbetty said...

warts just go away. we had tons.. and we treated them every which way.. and then we went to the doc and he said:
After awhile they will just go away..
and they DID!

Hyena In Petticoats said...

Jesus.

I don't even know what a canker sore is, but it sounds awful....

I swear by milk thistle for warts.
Break a stem in half and rub the sap onto the wart, letting it dry. Repeat every day until the wart is gone.

I got rid of one last year in about a week.

I hope you can sort out this latest spate of health problems Laura - good luck!

Leah xxx

laeroport said...

Thanks for not sharing a picture of 2 out of 3.

And I don't even have that much to blog about.

Apple said...

Sounds like stress to me!!

Chickenbells said...

Thank heavens the reaction hasn't been that bad. This is very interesting about the warts as well. Now, I get canker sores, after telling a good friend, she suggested Vitamin B (I take some sort of whole food one, I guess it's digested differently?) and the canker was gone within 2 days. I mean TOTALLY gone! It is truly amazing...

amy said...

i am mildly grossed out and wildly entertained. i think motherhood gives you superpowers.

Kristy said...

I think we call canker sores mouth ulcers. I have a few allergies (nothing on the scale of yours) and my worst is to a preservative sodium benzoate, E211, it causes mouth ulcers in lots of people and is often found in mouth washes and soft drinks etc .Worth a check. If I even sip a drink with it in then I get some ulcers.Before I found the cause I was brushing my teeth,gums and tongue so much because everyone thought it was an oral hygiene problem.The toothpaste I was using had sodium benzoate in it!! I ended up with huge ulcers all over my mouth and tongue.Good way to lose weight though!!!
About the warts, Josie got one when she was about 2 and the doc said they would dissapear in 18months.Two and a half years later she had 15+ all over her hands and a few tiny ones on her face.The doc still wouldn't do anything so we treated her at home with the freezing spray.We only treated the big original one and within a few weeks they all went.I wish I'd known about the duct tap method!

catebrook said...

You have a most interesting life. It's why I come back :)

Renee said...

I only just heard about the duct tape thing from my hairdresser last weekend. Weird, eh? I'll try it next time. Because there WILL be a next time soon with my warty family.

Sarah and Jack said...

Gah, I get the canker sores bad too. Whenever I bite my lip one will appear.

There used to be a good mouthwash made for them, but they stopped making it. Figures.

Missy said...

I have had good luck with rinsing with peroxide and then putting milk of magnesia on canker sores, about 3-4 times a day.

Jessica said...

Garggle with salt water. That will help get rid of the canker sore. DH gets them when he eats walnuts and the garggle seems to work wonders.

Anita said...

You are pretty funny. My daughter (age 14) uses the duct tape method. It has worked so far.

About these allergies- have you seen a chirporactor? I know, you are thinking- hey dumb Ass IT'S NOT MY BACK THAT IS THE PROBLEM- but I totally completely swear but it. I used to have HORRIBLE allergies and with a combo of chiropractor and acupuncture- nada. Done.

Try it. Maybe it'll work

www.homestory-anita.blogspot.com