I'm fairly well-known for running my mouth a little too much. Followed by a quick shoving the foot into mouth. Oh yes, I'm well-known.
I don't know what my problem is, but I am terrified of beginning a new year. On one hand I'm really excited for the potential of a "fresh start." I'm looking forward to wrapping up the holidays and bringing some "normalcy" back into our lives (although, I must admit, lounging around in sweats all day and not going anywhere is quite lovely).
I'm looking forward to cleaning the basement some more and having another garage sale. I'm looking forward to cleaning our bedroom and making be more grown-up (as opposed to the dumping ground it is now). I'm looking forward to more painting projects. I'm looking forward to forcing Aaron out of his cave and turning that room into a family office.
I'm looking forward to lots more cooking, lots more grilling, figuring out how to make some gluten-free bread (Aaron's craving jam and bread, jam and bread, oh please Heavenly Father he wants jam and bread).
I'm looking forward to spending lots more time with friends. I'm looking forward to gardening, going to the swimming pool this summer and spending lots of time at Science City.
And yet, I'm completely terrified of what the new year will bring.
In 2005 we experienced the great eye accident. This year I broke my foot and ruined the whole summer. What fucking catastrophe will we experience in 2007? Really, I know I shouldn't be but I am absolutely terrified to find out.
Another part of my nervousness, and perhaps this is why I'm so fucking nervous, is because I'm starting something new. Something I should be working on right now. Something I know will be good for me, my family and benefit a lot of people.
But still? It is scary. Scary and terrifying, terrifying and scary.