Monday, July 14, 2008

I'm Not Gonna Teach Him How to Dance! Dance! Dance! Dance!

I'm leaving for San Francisco in three days and I am FAHREAKING MY SHIT OUT.

All I continuously think of is horrible, horrible situation. Will I die in the plane? What about an earthquake? Will I be socially slitted for wearing Crocs and not painting me toenails? Will Aaron and the boys get into a car accident and die while I'm gone? Will Griffin really not miss me? Am I going to figure out how to program my shuffle to only play songs I like between now and then? Did my business cards really turn out good? What the hell am I going to do with myself on Sunday (my only day to see the city) now that I have to do it by myself? How the hell am I going to eat and not get sick from wheat? Oh my hell, I think I'm going to hurl.

And, of course, in my typical fashion, I did not begin making my computer bag until yesterday because nothing says getting-ready-for-a-business-trip like LET'S SEW SOMETHING COMPLICATED RIGHT BEFORE WE GO.


I'm about half-way through. I hope. I tried some of the instructions and scrapped them because... oh, hell. I'll bitch about that when the damn thing is done.

It will be done before I leave Thursday morning, right?

And then there's Aaron's complete freak-outs like what do you mean I have to take the boys swimming? and and you're gonna make us enough food to last the whole time you're gone, right? and you don't expect me to do laundry while you're gone, do you? and I'm all OHMYFUCKINGSHIT, AARON. You travel for three weeks at a time and I work from home and keep your children alive. Can you at least promise me you can keep them alive for the five days I'll be gone?

Completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out,completely-freaking-out, completely-freaking-out...

25 comments:

Mary said...

Deep cleansing breaths. You can do this. And I'm pretty sure you can do it without hurting anyone else. Visualize world peace. Or whirled peas. Whatever works for you.

hazeljoy said...

freaking out just a little are we?

gwendomama said...

that bitch made me get my toenails done too. damn.

i am FREAKING OUT TOO.


HEY - its my daughter's bday on sunday and the fam is picking me up at the st fancies and we is gonna play in the city. wanna hang?this will probably involve chinatown, as it is bean's fave.

miss chris said...

You can do it. And you're going to love San Francisco.

And Aaron? Well, he's just gonna have to deal. with. it.

kirsten said...

don't freak out. even with no instructions, aaron WILL keep the kids alive. for goodness sake DON'T cook for him - think of all he'll learn! ;)

amy said...

enjoy it darling! enjoy the time away. aaron will be fine. and cute fabric btw!

amy h said...

Chill! You must chill! (I have to quote my "Say Anything.")

You aren't really going to cook food for them to eat the whole time are you? Jeez. They can deal. Don't worry about them keeping the same routine. If they get loopy from going off routine, Daddy can handle it. It's boy time.

Enjoy your time to yourself! It should be fun! Can you bring some nonperishable wheat-free snacks?

PamKittyMorning said...

Have a great time!

kristi said...

Aw, hang in there. You can do it. And you don't need to paint your toenails. Soon the whole freakout will be behind you and you'll be in San Fran.

jennifer in tx said...

All work and no play...

jennifer in tx said...

You might try this on Sunday:
San Francisco Bay Area
Shopping Guide for Bento-style Packed Lunches
http://lunchinabox.net/2007/04/09/award-nomination-sf-bay-area-shopping-guide/

If you are into that kind of thing, Japanese craft Books?

Chickenbells said...

Oh...you are going to have so much fun! I wish I was going, I adore SF so much...you'll be just fine. Wear whatever footwear you want...it's California, they're forgiving (aren't they?) as long as you're comfortable, then you're happy and that's all that matters...

Well that and Aaron keeping the boys alive.

house on hill road said...

deep breaths....

don't cook for them. it'll make them appreciate you even more.

futuregirl said...

Number 1 - No one in San Francisco looks at anyone funny ... not even if you had a mohawk and a tutu on (saw that). You, your crocs, and your unpainted toenails will be fine.

B - You will not die on the plane. You will not be there during an earthquake.

Tres - San Francisco might be one of the only places where, when you have weirdo food concerns, they will take you seriously.

Also - There are a million and one awesome things to do in SF on Sunday. If you email me with what you normally like to do on a vacation day (walk outside, touristy stuff, museums, crack) I can tell you where to go.

p.s. That fabric is effing awesome!!!!!!! Really cool.

Jessica said...

Inhale exhald. I am sure you are going to have an amazing time. Your hubby can handle the kids or should I say the kids can handle him. Have a blast.

Crockpot Lady said...

dude! I'm so excited! What do you mean touring SF by yourself on Sun? No way is that going to happen... there are going to be OODLES of people touring from the conference on sunday. that will so not be a problem.

xxo
steph

tonkelu said...

1) Aaron needs to put on his big boy boxers and deal. Yes, he'll have to feed the boys. Yes, he has to take them to the pool. Yes, he has to do one load of laundry, start to finish (wash, dry, fold, put away) every day that you're gone. And, yes, he will live. If he keeps acting like a whiney ass I'll come over and randomly pick things to give to Goodwill.

2) The boys will miss you a little. The more Aaron keeps them occupied (pool, zoo, Reading Reptile, Wonderscope, etc.) the less they will miss you and the happier everyone will be.

3) I seriously doubt you'll die. I had this freak out too when I went to Vegas. It's normal Mommy Guilt, I think. I repeat this for the fear that your family will die. It's Mommy Guilt. You'll get over it (and I say that as sweetly as humanly possible).

4) Fuck the bag. Buy one. Why add more stress?

5) I bet you'll find it easier to eat in San Francisco than here in KC.

6) You're going to go and have a ball. So what if you're flying solo on Sunday? Fabulousness! You get to do everything you want to do without wiping noses, bottoms, breaking for naps, screaming, "HOLD MOMMY'S HAND!" searching for snacks, etc., etc. You get to be an adult. Hell, go sit on the beach and read. See a movie. Get a massage. You're going to be a woman of leisure!

Have tons and tons of fun. ;)

MichelleB said...

I agree with Futuregirl. After you see some of the people sites, you won't even remember what you're wearing. And I'm sure you won't be by yourself. Have a great time!

Mrs. Schmitty said...

Yes, you are officially freaking out. Have fun at BlogHer....God I wish I were going. *sigh

Leigh Ann said...

I am so excited for you! Remember, you are LTD for the rest of us.

So much fun yesterday.

LA

Stacy said...

I almost hyperventilate thinking of how fun San Francisco is too. Leave the worries behind and enjoy yourself. You can do this!

sltbee69 said...

What tonkelu said. You'll be fine. Enjoy yourself and take lots of pics, k?

Angelina said...

If there is any city more likely to post gluten free foods openly it's SF. Even so, it's a hairy world out there for everyone allergic to wheat.

You're going to be fine. Your kids are going to be fine. Aaron won't be fine, but he'll survive.

This trip is the best thing in the world for you all. It's time Aaron spent a few days in your shoes. He'll appreciate you more when you return. It's good for you to do something completely for yourself and by yourself.

You'll miss your boys but you'll also have more to share with them as a parent if you do independent things. They'll miss you but unless you plan on having them live with you for the rest of all of your lives then it's good for them to experience a few days without you.

Breath deeply and anticipate the fun you'll have meeting other bloggers and making really cool connections.

laeroport said...

Tell Aaron to put on his big boy pants and deal. Or I'll tell him for you.

and don't forget to breath. Breathing is good.

Evie said...

I hope you have a blast..now stop freaking out. HUGS