Tuesday, October 12, 2010

The Only Nasty Thing I Like is a Nasty Groove

It's kinda amazing how quickly a parent gets re-acclimated with being covered in another person's body fluids.

With the first kid, we were grossed out for months. But by the third? You just don't give a shit.

(Ba-dum-bum-bum.)

Pee? As long as it's below my elbows, we're cool. Easily washable. Thankfully.

The closest I've gotten to being grossed-out this time around was when Emerson angrily pooped on me a few weeks back (when I was still on antibiotics for my mastitis, and boy howdy did those drugs make him an angry pooper) and it was everywhere: my shirt, my pants, my arms, the floor. I think I even got some on my shoulder and in my hair.

Ick.

But I calmly changed him. Stripped down. Strapped him into his vibrating chair and took a shower.

Given how overdue I am for a shower, this situation is sounding rather lovely right now.


And spit up? Last week I dreamed I was on Dancing with the Stars and Mark Ballas was my dancing partner. He didn't like me much, probably because I kept interrupting the dancing to nurse Emery (and because I bitter that I didn't get to dance with Maks). Right before it was stage-time, he got really pissed because I was just covered in spit up. So the makeup artist decided to glitterize me. Because that was the only way to disguise the amount of dried spit up I was sporting.

That would have come in handy this morning, while at the grocery store I realized my left arm looked like a white, powder-y mess. The big, dried wet marks across the shoulders just highlighted my awesomeness.

8 comments:

Sarah Jackson said...

I call those white wet marks my mama accessory.

lori said...

but good lord look how CUTE he is! No one is looking at your spit up stains when there is a cute baby nearby....
xo

Vintage Tea Time said...

Oh, he's gorgeous though! I'm at the granny stage now - we show daughters' partners embarrassing photos of them as a baby whenever we can (;) ) - you'll be able to direct E's partners to your blog for the full grossed-out story! You've got a great sense of humour!

Monica said...

ok, but look at that gorgeous face!!!

kristi said...

He's so cute! Nicky was a constant spitter-upper. I ran out by myself to go to the store once, and saw a cute baby in the checkout who kept laughing at me. Eventually I realized there was spitup all over my left shoulder. No wonder he was laughing.

Jersey Knitting Mama said...

Yeah, I am so desensitized with kids poop and puke. I pay it no mind. Sorry you had mastitis!!!!!! That must suck so bad. I had it with my first kid too. Fever for 4 days. NO FUN.

Hang in there mama. They stay so young for so little time. Emerson is quite a cutie pie. Just look at that face.

Hope you are getting some rest too.

Sonya

Keyona said...

I'm right there with you. I just wish I were skinny enough to fit a change of clothes for myself in Kobi's diaper bag.

He's awesomely totally perfectly cute. ;)

Heather F. said...

Next time convince your dream to change partners to Maks. I mean, what a disappointment to miss out on that sweet goodness. Pinch his tush for me while you're at it.