Wednesday, June 18, 2008

You’re So Sad Maybe You Should Buy a Happy Meal

There's this aspect of parenting that no one tells you about.


It's the part where you kid acts like a total dumbass and it feels like everything you have taught him didn't really sink in. And you feel like a total failure.

Of course, there's other things people don't tell you, like how hella funny kids are, but it's hard to focus on that when your kid is throwing sand ten feet in the air and then acts like he doesn't speak English when you tell him to stop. Every year. For six years in a row.

Okay, maybe it's a little funny. But parenting is damn infuriating sometimes.

20 comments:

2 Vermont Chitlins said...

holy crap--I feel you lady.

D is in his room right now because I just couldn't deal with him "pretending" he couldn't hear me one.more.time. Telling him the same thing 426x a day obviously just isn't sinking in.

**sigh**
infuriating indeed.

but, also quite amazing all the same. Hang in there. and then make yourself a drink.

LauraJ said...

Welcome to my world...for the past 8 years 10 months, 3 days. ACK! And summer is coming and I'm stuck with him for 74 days during the day....holy f#ckcakes pass me the bottle.

kristin said...

okay, yes.


damn.

what a pretty picture you chose.

Autum said...

You're preaching to the choir sister.
Wanna trade that sand thrower for my 18 year old?

amy h said...

He actually sat in the sand saying "no speak English"? :) It is a little funny.

We have trouble with the sand-throwing, too. It is irresistible.

TraceyTreasure said...

just wait until you have to teach him how to drive a car! That's when the fun starts! Hugs!

Heidijayhawk said...

oh holy hell. i'm right there with ya.

tonkelu said...

Yes, yes and yes.

I actually got up close and personal with JP today, cupped his little head in my hands and said, "What part of 'stop it' isn't clear to you?" He had no response and actually stopped banging on the door (which is mostly glass).

Then there are the time when they pretend they can't hear me and karma jumps up and bites 'em in the ass. SG had a big ol' stick in her hands and I kept saying, "Put it down. Put. It. Down." She ignored me for a bit, then tossed it at the street. It boomeranged back up and smacked her in the head. Inside my head I was laughing my ass off. Did I feel guilty? No. Am I a bad Mama? It's possible...

Green Kitchen said...

I was just thinking about how much a person can hate their kids and love them at the same time -- it's so much contrast it hurts.

Ella said...

I'm so glad to read your post. I'm so sick of the blogs where all the kids are "great" and all the moms write how they're "blessed"...grrr!

I wish I could tell you it gets easier. I really wish I could!

Ali said...

Oh yes. A scenario which is achingly familiar.

Diane said...

Don't worry Laura, the little sh*ts are paying more attention than you think. It'll take years, but one day you will be the smartest person they have ever met. Mine are 17 and 24. The 17 year old still thinks I'm a little on the slow side, but he's coming around. The 24 year old thinks I'm like the keeper of all knowledge. (Got him buffalo-ed, but good!)

Michelle said...

Personally? I think there are far too many aspects of parenting they don't tell you. Wait until they're older, and they tell you that there was. no. way. that they saw the clean clothes in the dryer that they put the wet clothes on top of. No. Way. And why don't I believe him? How could I possibly not believe him? Amazing creatures they are.

2 Vermont Chitlins said...

man my drink(s) was good last night...how was yours?

;-)

lera said...

You are way too funny. Sometimes I think I speak a foreign language and my children don't understand me!

Mirre said...

I think my son's ears are broken. It's either that or he doesn't understand Dutch anymore...

I hope you'll have a happy weekend!

Suzie Sews said...

Oh the joys!!!!You gotta love em!!!

laeroport said...

I know! And if they are like this NOW, lord help us when they are teenagers. That's what I'm sayin.

moosh in indy. said...

Uh, yeah. Amen.

Mrs. Schmitty said...

I stumbled here from BlogHer...glad I did...I am SO with you on this one!