Just Think What Tomorrow Will Do

Presents were wrapped, cookies were baked and clean laundry was chucked in the playroom to be dealt with on another day.

After the last few months, the holiday was frazzled. But that's what holidays are suppose to be, right? Frazzling?

[Just nod your head in agreement, mkay?]

The last week of December is my favorite, it's finally an opportunity to relax. Time to play with stuff, to hang out as a family and put some damn laundry away.

Seriously. It took me five damn days but now all our clean laundry is put away. Not a single laundry basket is in use.

Just don't ask that situation in a few hours.


So now we're lego'ing, reading, not watching the clock, eating leftover cookies and one person in particular is teething.

Yeouch.

I'll Do Anything That You Want Me To

Nope. Baby's not any better. Two showers daily is my minimum and I still smell like vomit.

Happy holidays!

Coming home from Michigan, Emerson stopped pooping right. And did you know? That day after we got home Aaron went out of town again. Which means he was home the weekend of Halloween, Thanksgiving weekend, 36-ish hours one week and with the family for his sister's wedding in Michigan. That's it.

So four days after we got home I took Emerson to the doctor 'cause he was pissy. And I mean piss-say. And he's not a pissy baby.

Before we left he had... you know. "Done his business" and his "business" looked like shredded tree bark. The doctor ordered x-rays, said he had some bits of constipation, gas and fluids and should be better in a few days.

A few days later she called and ordered us to the hospital for emergency x-rays (have I mentioned Aaron was out of town?) after a radiologist looked at his first batch. Nothing worse, but nothing too much better. So I volunteered to eat a dairy-free diet to see if that helped.

I've been on this dairy-free diet (which I know I'm doing right 'cause Griffin and Darwin have been diary-free FOREVER) for 10 days and now I'm getting sick (I'll save you the details, but yes! my digestive tract!), Emerson's kinda doing better with his digestive tract but not significantly better (hello, more shredded tree bark lookin' stuff and pissy baby today!) and did you know? Christmas Eve is tomorrow, Aaron just got home Sunday and I have so many godddamn hormones running in my bloodstream, all I want to do is cry BUT I CAN'T CRY 'CAUSE I HAVE TOO MUCH TO DO.


But all my babies are alive. And healthy. (-ish)

So we're having store-bought cupcakes for holiday desserts. I'm only making two types of cookies (which, let's face it, it may get cut down to one), some presents are gonna be grouped together for less wrapping and I'm gonna do my best to stop freaking the fuck out and try to relax until we see the pediatric gastrologist in February.

Won't You Show Some Class

We have a long-standing tradition to buy Lego Advent Calendars during the holiday season. We started doing them when we were dating and... yeah. It's taken on a life of its own.

One would tend to think that the Debacle of 2005 would be the pinnacle of What the frack is Lego thinking? But, turns out, they've outdone themselves.

Outdone themselves in a very majestic way.

I present: Naked Old Man Lego


Don't look at me. I didn't go there. Lego did. I'm just reporting like a good samaritan.

Because, you know, nothing says Happy Holidays! like an old man with an elf fetish wearing a black thong about to get his groove on.


See? He's even brushing his beard for sexy times.

Now, I would like to give Lego the benefit of the doubt here with the notion that maybe, just possibly the intention was for him to be a member of the Polar Bear Club... but maybe swim trunks? And um... a dolphin? You know, something that doesn't have a parent have to explain NAKED LEGO MAN in the advent calendar.

And the bigger questions in our house: WHAT'S A THONG? and IS HIS PENIS REALLY THAT BIG?

And Sway to the Rhythm of Love

We snuck out of town.

Well, with a family of five and outrageous food allergies, I'm not quite certain how much sneaking was involved exactly, but we roadtrip'd for two days to Michigan.


It's a long drive. Longer when a nursing babe is involved.

But totally worth it, because we got to attend Aaron's sister's wedding.


We love Mandy ("Hot Mandy" as the boys like to call her, instead of "Aunt Mandy") and Ryan's awesome too. We're so very happy for them.

Next month Mandy leaves for Basic Training and Ryan follows a couple of months later. When these kids decided to jump into life, they jumped high. We're proud. Scared. Worried. Hopeful. And optimistic.

Out gift to them was their guest book, but not any guest book. I ran around with my Instax and took photos of the families who attended. I adhered them to 8x8 pages I had cut to fit and match the album and then had the families sign the paper.


Initially people thought I was crazy. But once I got a few examples (and some booze into the attendants) everyone got involved and excited. It was definitely a fun, hectic process - but so totally worth it.

We're home, safe and sound. And ready to get the holidays (including our Lego advent calendars) underway.

I guess I'll catch my breathe in the new year.